I can’t stand it when my husband is stressed. I must selfishly admit that his stress can cause tension that is hard for me to handle. We are all aware of how another family member’s attitude can impact everyone in the house, and as the wife and mother, we need to keep our eyes on the emotional thermostat of our home. So whether it is the daily grind or there is something massive weighing on his shoulders, sometimes our husbands need a little help relieving some stress. Always start with prayer, but for a more tangible tactic, try one (or more!) of the following:
- Listen to him. There are days when so many people are in his ear about “fix that” and “fix this” that he does not need a sermon on how to adjust his attitude. He needs to be able to unload the weight. This is not the time to jump in with all of your wisdom to fix the problem. Attentively listen to what he has to say and be sure to withhold correction, judgment, and opinion unless he asks you for your input. And if does ask, remember to speak to him gently.
- Cook him one of his favorite dishes. Maybe it is a dessert, maybe it is a hearty breakfast, but the point is that you will be comforting your husband in one of his favorite ways: his tummy. The old saying the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach has stood the test of time for a reason – it’s true.
- Encourage and compliment him. This world does everything in its power to beat a man down. Your husband needs to hear you say that you appreciate him – and be specific! You have the power to strengthen your husband beyond your comprehension just by being the one source that builds his confidence.
- Work it out of him. Wait. Stop. That does not mean a honey-do list. That means exercise. Go for a run together. Shoot some hoops in the driveway. Sometimes my husband is happy just to have me in the golf cart next to him. Let him burn that stress away by engaging in his favorite physical activity.
- Penalty-free time with the guys. Your husband needs time away with his friends just like you do. Unfortunately, wives are notorious for laying on a guilt trip for such excursions and this negates the benefits that he gained from having guy time. To avoid the guilt trip, be sure to discuss plans before hand so that both of you know what is expected. My husband loves to play basketball on Friday nights and Sunday afternoons. Friday nights are his time to himself and Sundays he takes the kids. We know what to expect and he gets the time with the guys that he needs.
- Respect his space. Maybe your husband is more kept to himself. If he tells you he needs some time alone to decompress, honor that by not checking in on him every half hour. Let him know that he can come to you if he needs something. Don’t be pushy and pestering by asking him a bunch of questions. Just give him the time and the space that he needs. He will surely let you know when he needs you.
- Give him a gentle massage. Physical touch is important to everyone’s well-being. In a situation where your husband is tense, you are the best person on the planet to rub away the knots. And if one thing leads to another…
- Make love. Ladies, if we are honest, we spend way too much time neglecting our husbands in this area and it is more important to him than you may realize. Perhaps if he is tense and stressed, you might want to be the one that initiates. He needs to know that you need him and that you love him. Show him.
Husbands do not follow formulas, so help me out. You’ve heard my ideas, now I’d love to hear yours! In what ways do you help reduce your husband’s stress?
Abide in His Grace,
This post was shared with Time-Warp Wife, To Love, Honor, and Vacuum, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, Messy Marriage, Marriage, Motherhood and Missions, the Hearts for Home Blog Hop, Becoming a Godly Wife, Essential Thing Devotions and A Little R and R.